Suppressing The Surreal

I’ve never had an experience whereby I could sense that someone was going to die. 

It is of course possible that this inkling was formed through bits and pieces of information that was fed to me throughout the past few weeks.

My grandfather passed away last night. He was 89 based on the Chinese calendar, something which I have yet to figure out. Exactly a week ago, I felt the urgency, which culminated in the urge to shoot some portraits of him. I knew that he didn’t have much time left, and the whole atmosphere of the nursing home made it all the more difficult to conecptualise on the spot portraits that would enable his loved ones to remember him in their own little ways. 

Last night was an extremely surreal experience. The weathered ivory face that I saw covered with a linen cloth just did not resonate with the Grandfather I had seen barely a week earlier. I was winded for a split second, and I tried my best to suppress the emotions welling up within me.

I have never done that well.

I did, however, try to rationalise that it was for the best. I brought myself back to reality, and reminded myself constantly that it is an inevitability. There was no point wondering where he is now, but to only hope that he suffers no more, neither from the sicknesses that plagued him during his last days, nor the multiple quarrels he had to endure with the deadbeat sons he fathered.

While at the wake today, I had concepts in my mind of how I wanted to remember this process that so many people go through just because. For simple reasons like tradition, culture, and religion – and oftentimes obligation. I framed shots mentally, but somehow wasn’t able to whip out my camera to document how I wanted to remember him at this very moment. I do hope I will be able to accomplish that tomorrow.

Here are the three pictures placed near the altar.

I hope you can see the pain as I did, albeit with a glint of satisfaction at the slightest change in routine. Tantamount to incarceration, from my experience.

 

 

 

Street Portraits

Having recently discovered the intrigue and allure of street portraits, it’s been a while since I’ve wanted to share some shots from the past couple of street sessions that I had. 

However, i’ve been busy trying to work as much as I can to save up for my trip to Oz, so it’s been some time coming. 

Experiencing the energy while trying to capture a portrait on the street was refreshing for me, and the closer I got to the subject, the faster my heart galloped. It was my first time shooting a street portrait with a wide-angle lens. Apart from shortening the distance between the subject and myself, this lens forced me into a realm in which I had never ventured before – actual interaction with many of the subjects. In addition to assessing the quality and direction of light, environment, background and other factors that I try to remind myself to consider, I now had to juggle the possibility of my face, and camera, being smashed. Not at all an inviting thought. 

I’m glad that I emerged unscathed, and a little more enlightened. I enjoyed myself immensely while shooting the subjects. Some of them allowed me to engage them, through subtle nods, a smile, or simply with a slight gaze. Some ignored my efforts at forging a momentary relationship, and thankfully there was only one who looked like he wanted my head on a platter and eyes carved out with a spoon. 

I allowed myself to sink back into the the stealthy role of a poacher for the next short set of portraits. Switching to a longer lens allowed me the distance that I was comfortable with, as well as providing me with ample time to frame my subjects, and to wait for the right moment. Although i may have gotten better exposures on these shots, the exhilaration was missing. More apparent than that, was that the eyes of the subjects in this second batch seemed to lack rigour. Cast away, almost. 

So what will you have? Lively, or a little more pensive? That’s the beauty of art, isn’t it? It can work both ways.  Enjoy! 

Set 1: Little India, Singapore

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Set 2: Chinatown, Singapore

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やなぎみわ – YANAGI Miwa

I first came across Yanagi Miwa a couple of months back while researching for ideas for a competition. While browsing around for inspiration this evening, I find myself crossing paths yet again with this hilarious artist / photographer. No doubt I have absolutely no impression of her as a person, considering I have never met her, yet her series entitled Fairy Tale left such an intriguing impression that I cannot but feel the ridiculous humour that could potentially emanate from this woman. 

The following images, Rapunzel and Little Red Riding Hood, are but two amazing images form this series.  It gives a little zing to these unassuming fairy tales, adding cynicism, creativity, a tad of horror, and finally garnishing the viewer’s stomach with a puree of frogs’ eyes. 

What dazzles me even more is her realistic interpretation of these scenes – much like how an adult would view them without having had any fond childhood memories taint the language of the respective tale.  The props used as well as the post-processing of these images are at first on the verge of overkill, but somehow manage to expand my appetite the deeper I delve into the image, leaving me gasping and asking for more. 

I hope you enjoy the series as much as I did.  You can view the entire series from her website here.  YANAGI Miwa – Fairy Tale

If you happen to be in Japan, do drop in for her exhibition, My Grandmothers, at the Tokyo Metropolitan Museum of Photography. The Exhibition runs from March 7th 2009 to May 10th 2009. She will also be exhibiting at the Venice Biennale 2009. 

 

Litte Red Riding Hood © YANAGI Miwa, 2004

 

Rapunzel ©YANAGI Miwa, 2004

Sha-Do Collective

Was introduced to a collective of 5 photographers based in Japan. 

Pretty interesting stuff, especially the street and documentary work.
Sha-Do Collective

Chinatown in Mono

It’s been a while since I had that much fun shooting. Made my way down to Chinatown with Chloe, and we went to a block just opposite the temple that houses Buddha’s Tooth Relic.

Block 5 it was.

The block was undergoing renovations. New lift-landings were being carved out, but its residents seemed almost unaware of all the movement around them.

The sight of children playing and television sets blaring out advertisements and TV serials was replaced with a slow, grinding silence. Every once in a while I would see the shadow of a resident of Block 5 crawl along the walls. Sometimes it paused, pondered, but eventually continued on its way.

Block 5 existed in the present, but lived without time.

It’s somewhere I would visit again. Everything in moderation.

Monochrome Al-Frescoes

I’ve been shooting in colour for a while now, and figured it’s time I went back to basics.

In this series I aim to isolate the subject, to allow the textures and contrasts, and ultimately the composition, to speak out on its own, without the aid of colour themes and tones.

At this point in my life, learning to accept simplicity is vital, and I hope that through these images I’ll be able to hold on to that, and not get carried away by the many distractions around.

Back to the old school

The advancement of digital technology has made art more accesible to more people.
Vinyls have made way for CDs, and film has made way for ccd sensors.
A stark difference, however, still remains between the realized pieces propelled through vinyl or film.
I was shown some portraits caught on film today, and was blown away by how a monochrome image could look.
Another area I can hopefully delve into at some stage.

Beginnings and Uncertainties

My best friend mentioned the other day that it’s the ups-and-downs in life that keep us going. I have yet to decide if by the law of large numbers, this becomes comparable to leading an average mundane life. 

The transition from school to non-school life has been a difficult one for me. There is ultimately some truth to it when some say that once you’re out  in the working world, you’ll miss school life. Well, it hasn’t exactly been that way for me, but I do miss school. I miss the grandeur delusions that are served to you on a scroll at the beginning and end of every semester, of how your knowledge and experiences in school will catapult you into the deeper realms of the aspirational class. Maybe in a different time this might have been true. Not in this current economy. 

At the same time, I’m glad that while it has been difficult coping with graduating during a recession, I have found support from friends and loved ones, and that has at least spurred me on to want to pursue my interests and my own delusions. 

In photography I have found a different outlet of expression. Photography is therapy. Where writing has allowed me to vent, rant, laugh, cry, argue, and speak to myself, frustration builds up when the words just don’t come out. Photography, on the other hand, allows me to do all that, sometimes without even having to worry about the process or the outcome. 

I hope that this is the beginning of something good. The pain is fine. I can deal with it. It’s just the uncertainty of shoulda woulda coulda.